One Little Monster!

Lately, being Maggie's mother has been like being in a 12 Step Program- here are mine:


Twelve Steps

1. I admitted I was powerless over MAGGIE—that my live had become unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than myself could restore me to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn my will and my lives over to the care of God as I understood Him.
4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of myself.
5. Admitted to God, to myself, and to another human being the exact nature of my wrongs.
6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
7. Humbly asked Him to remove my shortcomings.
8. Made a list of all persons I had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10. Continued to take personal inventory and when I was wrong promptly admitted it.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve my conscious contact with God as I understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His Will for me and the power to carry that out.
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, I tried to carry this message to Maggie's care-givers, and to practice these principles in all my affairs.

Things aren't going so well here and I have not figured out how to make it right. I do know that with ALL Three of my children, I have felt that I could not be their mother at some point during the ages of 3-4, but this is the worst one so far. Because now not only do I need to take a firm stand with her, but I also need to parent two other monsters with commitments. That limits what I am able to do to/with Maggie. I cannot be in the house all day while she sits for hours on end in the time-out chair. Because in case you were wondering, she is the kid that would do something to get herself in time-out as I was walking out the door to pick the other two up, just to call my bluff. And even if I put her in time-out when we got back, she would still think she got one over on me because Time-out waited for her. Don't believe me that that is my 3 year old's thought process- Just go on and ask my crazy sister she'll tell you because she thinks the same twisted way. It is hard to be the parent of a child THAT manipulative. And as a crazy person myself, I find it hard playing mind games all day.

All that said, I do LOVE her so much and I know things will get better-